Natcha Kucita on balancing BIM engineering with pottery making
Based in London, Natcha Kucita is a freelance BIM Engineer and Founder of the Vessel of Light, an earthy ceramics studio that explores timelessness through clay. Last year, she left her full-time role as Senior BIM Designer at Integral Group to pursue the healing middle-ground between contractor and ceramicist.
In her conversation with Gubns, Natcha shares her story of finding balance between two opposing disciplines - the yin and yang between engineering and pottery making - and her spiritual journey of being present behind the wheel.
Let’s start from the beginning: where and what did you study?
I completed both my Masters and Bachelors degree in Civil Engineering and Architecture at the University of Southampton. I actually wanted to go to architecture school but never studied art or physics, so I didn't get in. Southampton was more of a backup plan, and my brother was already there studying mechanical engineering, so it just kind of happened.
Civil engineering versus architecture. Any regrets looking back?
The first and the second year was really hard, because I’d really wanted to do something creative and obviously, engineering is not like that; it's the opposite. But then I found the Architectural Engineering courses weren't that creative either because we had to make sure whatever designs we came up with actually work.
The fun parts were at the beginning until a few weeks into a project, it's like, okay, how do you make it work? Our supervisors were quite strict in terms of shooting down ideas because they'd say, “in an art school, it'd be great. But what about here?”
Right, less creative freedom. So after completing your degrees, where was your first place of work?
I was offered an internship in Bournemouth working for a building services company. This actually didn’t have much to do with my studies, it was more about the whole engineering systems design. I was offered a placement there and I took it, because why not? The opportunity came in, it was next door to a south beach town which is really nice, and it became the start of my career.
I was there for two years. I’d entered as an engineering grad but didn't stick to it because by the end, I thought it was so boring. I didn't want to go down this route of designing mechanical systems for the rest of my life. But, what I discovered there was building information modeling, which is now my current role as a BIM engineer.
And this role is less boring?
Definitely!
How would you describe what you do for a living to someone who’s never heard of a BIM Engineer?
If you imagine a whole building as a finished puzzle, I’m the one who fits the pieces together from start to finish. I manage the evolution of these building designs.
I receive each component - whether it’s from the engineer or the architect, who may not know how everything fits together - I take all of that, organize the information and complete the puzzle.
There’s an inherent creativity in that, which you felt was missing from studying engineering. The ‘creativity’ isn't with the finished product because that's already predetermined, but it’s within your processes.
Exactly, it's the workflow which I'm drawn to the most. In a way, it's the interaction with different designers that I enjoy. It’s not just about the exchange and organisation of information, it’s also about timing and relationship building. It’s about predicting risks and all these unknown factors that could arise. And from each design, there's actually quite a human aspect to it.
People can use CAD to exchange information and companies can use whatever modeling tools are out there, but you’ll always need someone to look after it. You’d need someone like me in an engineering firm and someone like me in an architecture firm talking to one another in a less technical manner so we can avoid mistakes down the line. My job is to eliminate risks by simply talking about the model, the design or the project.
“Simply talking” makes BIM Engineering sound simple but as we all know, there are levels and layers in communicating.
Yes, there’s persuasion involved and then there’s politics.
Let’s recap. You’ve been craving creativity since you were young and felt deprived of it having chosen the engineering route instead of architecture, but then found your calling in the human side to BIM Engineering. Now, this surge for creativity comes back in the form of ceramics. How did this come about, was there a specific spark moment?
I think it has always been there living within me since I was about three or four years old. I've always wanted to be an artist, but it's just that life took me in a different direction. So the coming of this project - Vessel of Light - is the first official outlet where I'm like, you know what, I now have the foundation to make my original dreams happen.
V O L Ceramics Collection / Photo by Natcha Kucita
Is that because you’ve found stability in your career, with a steady and reliable source of income?
I mean, that definitely made it much more accommodating and gave me a landing cushion to fall back on. But I decided to quit my full time role and start my own business as a freelancing contractor last winter of 2020, which was when I also started the Vessel of Light. Now, I get to decide how to spend my time: say, six months I've got a contract, and the other six months I get to dedicate to my creative projects.
That must’ve been a huge moment, to leave your full-time job?
Yeah, I had to take the plunge. There was this burning desire to know what it's like to live like an artist. During the pandemic, the plan was to dedicate all my time to making and putting my work out to the first event I did, which was a pop-up with my artist friend at Nocturnal Aesthetics Black Boutique in Chelsea, which turned out to be very successful.
At the time it was still kind of surreal to me - having studied engineering and finished a degree - to then quit my job. But I strongly recommend people to at least try and not be afraid of taking the plunge and pursuing your vision. Obviously, I knew that engineering will always be there for me, but I didn't need to choose anymore. It took me some time to resolve in my head, “why should I have to choose between an art career and a stable engineering career? Why can’t I intertwine both?” That was the epiphany moment for me.
V O L Pop-up at Nocturnal Aesthetics Black Boutique / Photo by Puttatida
What happened next, were there any hurdles or did it all start coming together naturally?
By that point, I had started attracting more creative friends and soon became surrounded by all these designers and makers. They helped me get over the fear of wondering how people were going to interpret my work. I know a lot of designers who spend quite a few years building the confidence to be ok with having their work out in the world, and for me, I learned to enjoy the process of sharing my work on display, regardless of whether people buy them or not. It was about the flow.
How have you learned to balance your engineering work with pottery making?
When it comes to balance, I prioritize my health first. I remember when I had my full-time job, I’d take on a new client and plunge into one extreme. It was so tiring, mentally and physically, to sit at work in the office from nine to five and then run along afterwards to try and set up a small business and on top of that, take care of your creations.
It was extremely intense in the beginning and I think it’s about being completely honest with yourself and asking, “can my body take this? Can my nervous system handle this right now?” If the answer is no, then you simply have to downsize. I learned to stabilize my health and my well-being first, then take a realistic look at the time that I have. So on weekdays, while I'm waiting for my pots to come out of the kiln, I don’t have to sit and wait and wonder what's going to happen to it; I can work on my contracting projects. My left brain was functioning with logic while my right brain was still flowing with creativity.
Coming from an Asian family, I grew up bombarded with this idea that I would be a broke artist if I pursued something like painting. There’s this feeling of unworthiness that I held as a child and if anything, it's been healing to find the beauty in creating is still there for me.
I've convinced my parents now that I'm an engineer-potter, take it or leave it. It’s taken a minute - five or ten years - but whatever it takes, right? It’s important to accept that you’re deserving and worthy. To accept your desire and be what you want to be, and then allow yourself to have it. If you don't allow yourself to have it, you will never have it. Instead, you will always have this question: “but what if?”
Hand-throwing in East London / Photo by Natcha Kucita
A lot of life lessons there. What were some lessons you had to learn along the way that engineering school never taught you?
In engineering school or at work, we're constantly moving onto the next project, the next client or the next rung of the career ladder. There’s always something on the horizon that we’re in pursuit of, whereas in the making process, I’m completely in the here and now.
When I'm working in the office, I’m on autopilot with a bunch of technology. But when I’m working with clay, the wheel is sensitive to my state of mind and how I feel that day. It’s given me a sort of new, spiritual insight that I would never get from an office environment. It’s you, with you and you. For me, it was an opportunity to solidify a relationship with myself that may have been neglected.
Hand-throwing / Photo by Natcha Kucita
Were there business aspects entirely new to you, for example, did learn marketing or financing skills?
I got a lot of help through my fellow designer friends. We have a really good knowledge-sharing WhatsApp group with advice ranging from PR to popups. I'm quite good at sustaining relationships with these creatives who are already established, and just learning along with them. In terms of PR and marketing, the biggest thing right now is social media but I sometimes think that can cause a lot of stress. I try not to let that dominate me with worrying about followers. I remind myself social media is just a window to peek in; it doesn't define the whole show.
I must admit, in the beginning, a lot of people were telling me “your photos should be brighter” or there were a lot of do’s and don’ts. But you have to do what is intuitive and natural to you, otherwise you’ll scroll endlessly and always find a weaker dictation or style that someone has seen somewhere before.
I know we talked about being present at the clay wheel but since we’re off the wheel right now, where do you see this maker journey going?
The dream is definitely to have my own studio. I have a vision for a studio somewhere not too far or too close from the city.
Slow Carving / Photo by Natcha Kucita
Would you still be a freelancing BIM Engineer?
I could be. I envision this intertwined engineering and art practice to keep going for a while until I feel there's definitely more demand coming in to just make. I definitely want to expand my community and work on more collaborations with my ceramics, not just with commissions but with food brands, events, supper clubs and things like that. For me it’s about giving, meaning and service. I could create 100 pots for myself and live in the woods like a hermit, but what's the point if I don't come out to share it? In the end, it’s about the journey, not about being the top potter out there.
With that, I’d like to end on your latest creation, five years from now. What have you just made?
My latest make five years from now out of my own studio will be a sculptural light piece. I don't know what it's going to look like yet, but it will be luminous, like a painting with lights. I will be merging my engineering side with my art side and I think that will be another epiphany moment; I think it’ll be very emotional.
Follow Natcha on Instagram: @thevesseloflight